Teenage mothers need all the help they can get…

I’m quite sure many of you have been reading with interest and sadness at the plight of 15-year-old mother Hue Xiao Pei who gave away her baby son but had lodged a false police report to claim that he was “missing”. While it’s not right to lodge false reports, I cannot help but sympathise with her. What can you expect her to do?

I am thankful that no one has been quick to judge and condemn her for what she did. She simply did not know better and granted, if she knew where to look for help, she would’ve gone there instead of giving the baby away and only to make a false report regarding the “missing” baby.

That is why it is very heartening for me to read that there are many NGOs and government bodies that are willing to come forward to offer help and counselling to teenaged mothers like Xiao Pei. The Women’s Aid Organisation, Shelter Home, the MCA and the Welfare Department as well as many churches and temples have made their services known and are offering counselling for young girls who got pregnant. These organisations must be commended for their undying effort to reach out to these kids and give them help. Ultimately however, the parents should be the one to give their own children the support, love and help that they so dearly needed.

Rather than criticising these girls, we should all do our part to give them counsel and support them, not rejecting them. It’s bad enough already that they went through labour pains at such a young age when they should have still be in school studying, why must parents and society give them more pain by rejecting them and harshly criticising them? In fact, I want to thank Xiao Pei and praise her for not aborting the baby when she first got pregnant. Yes, I am pro-life and strictly very anti-abortion – it serves no purpose other than that of selfish abortionist and in the long run, it’ll hurt the mothers more than anything.

Remember, these girls may have made some poor judgments, it is not their fault. Neither are the boys…unless they’re clearly much older. Unless the girls are victims of rapists, I would rather put the blame of parents who do not give that “talk” to their kids.

The fact that there are so many teenage mothers – be they married or not – it all boils down to the lack of awareness regarding sexual matters and their immaturity when it comes to dealing with the emotional issues of sex. How can anyone at the age of 13 comprehend what it means to be a mother/father at that age??

Do you now see how critical it is for sexual education to be had in schools? If our children have been educated and are aware the huge responsibilities that comes when two people have sex, there wouldn’t be too many teenage pregnancies. We must realise that sex education does not just involve educating kids about the physical part of sex but the emotional aspect as well as the spiritual aspect of sex. Talking about sex is not evil, it’s not dirty – hiding the right information and telling lies to your kids IS!

If you want what’s best for your child, it’s best that you parents and teachers come clean with your kids about sex and not leave it to someone else less informed to educate your child. When that happens and when your kid ending up becoming pregnant or caused a girl to get pregnant, your child is not to blame…you are. Parents have to assume the responsibility. And you’re not going to do any favours for your kids if you scold and reject them.

That said, I want to know what is happening with the proposed curriculum on sexual education that the Education Minister promised? Why are all fronts so quiet about it now? I’m rather disappointed by this you know…

Teen pregnancies are a prevalent problem today. Sometime back, there was also news in Singapore on the rise of teen marriages. To me, education and maturity on the issue of sex is the key to overcoming this problem. It may not be at a critical stage yet, but we should better start nipping the problem in the bud before things get out of control. Prevention is always better than the cure, so says the oft-quoted cliche.

Of course, this emergence of this issue has all the more fired me up in my passion for pursuing a degree in counselling. The society needs more willing and good listeners as well as problem-solvers and good decision-makers like professional counsellors to offer people some hope. It’s a noble profession, a noble thing to do – helping others. So, I’m gonna ensure that I do well in my studies in this area and then apply to the board of counsellors to obtain certification that will allow me to offer counselling services to the needy.


  1. Good on you, mate! All the best.

    Unfortunately, that is only one of many factors that cause this to happen. There’s still rampant sexual content broadcasting influence and let’s not forget the broken home bit.

    By the way, here’s what bugs me EVERYtime this issue pops up in Malaysia. It’s good that the public is more helpful and less condemning now but the question still remains:

    “What about the father?”

  2. The father is also to be held equally responsible. It takes two hands to clap, and it sickens me that a guy can get away with it.

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